Whenever I go to a shipper or receiver for the first time, if there is somewhere to pull off out of the way, I take advantage of it. That way, I can get out and walk to where I think I need to be and take a look instead of just pulling in and having to do 4 u-turns and a Hail Mary in between 37 cars. One morning I arrived early, and there was a great space to pull off outside the gate of what I was pretty sure was my receiver.

There was a truck in front of the office, and there was a driver in it. I thought, “I will walk that way and wave, if he’s friendly he will tell me the deal here.” I waved, he waved, the wave plan was a success! So I casually strolled that way, still working on a proper trucker stroll, practice, practice, practice. He opened his door and I said,”Good morning, is this such-and-such?”

He replied, “Yes, they are not open yet, but when they do, you will back into the dock on the other side of the building.”

As he was telling me this he was taking the cap off a gallon milk jug. I kind of thought he was going to chug milk straight from the jug, but he sort of half turned and poured it out the door. I was 15 feet away or so, and out of the splash zone. My first thought was, “that’s not milk…that’s not water… is it beer?” My next thought was,”why is he pouring it out here, literally the front step of a really nice office front?!?!?”

Then the smell enlightened me, it was pee, and a gallon of it. I kind of thought the way it smelled this old boy might need medical attention. He was still talking, no idea what he said because I was still watching him pour pee out all on his steps up into his truck and all over the front step of this office. I sort of gained my mobility back and was, “ok, well, thanks and stuff…” and was walking toward my truck.

He said, “Hey, hold on a sec, I want to ask you something.” Then grabbed another milk jug full of pee and proceeded to pour it on top of the now toxic puddle.

I was like, “Man, I got to tell you, that’s probably not a good idea to pour that out there and stuff.”

He says, “awww, f&@k ’em.” hyuck, hyuck. (Best description of that laugh I got)

He jumps out of his truck, and over Lake Holystankypiss, which causes his pants to fall to his knees and him to fall. There has never been a time in my life my first reaction wouldn’t be to help someone that just fell, except for right then. It literally didn’t cross my mind.

This man walks over to me, puts his head to his side and blows snot on the ground, takes his hand and wipes his nose off. He then reaches into his pocket to hand me a business card for his trucking company who has a referral bonus program, and he thinks I would be a good fit. I said, “I already have a card thaaaannks!” I am sort of jogging back to my truck, thinking ,”No more wave plans, not worth it.” I get in my truck and tell Freckles if I ever do any of the things that man just did, we are going home. He has been alone for waaayyyy too long. She looks and says, “Nope he’s not alone.”

We look and watch Four dogs get out of this mans truck to poo in the grass, again by the front door. It no longer shocks me that truckers aren’t welcome to park in a lot of places.